NBC Thursday's Best Jokes This Week

"I'm not jealous"- Troy is jealous of Jeff's dinner with his best friend Abed. (Community)

Shirley as Samuel L Jackson in Pulp Fiction. (Community)

"I want you take this money and buy a book, it's called '7 Habits of Highly Effective People'!"- Vance tries to help out a stripper at his bachelor party. (Perfect Couples)

 Leigh and Rex call each other every half hour to gossip about their respective parties. (Perfect Couples)

"You're not smart"- Leigh to Dave after he spills his darkest secrets to the whole room trying to head off Vance's threat of revealing them on Julia's voicemail. The voicemail says "Dave, you are your own worst enemy". (Perfect Couples)

Moments of transcendence. (Perfect Couples)

"Now you've hurt me twice" -Vance after Dave calls his wife his best friend, explaining why he told her Vance's secret. (Perfect Couples)

"THAT is Dallas" - Kevin swindles Andy and Darell out of their money by faking a fit during a game of Dallas the board game where they've been inventing all the rules. (The Office)

Hundreds of candles set off the sprinklers during Michael's adorable proposal to Holly. (The Office)

"It's called the ground when it's outside"- Ron after Ben says he'll sleep on the floor while camping. (Parks and Recreation)

Tom watches season 6 of Top Chef (the Voltaggio season) in his high tech tent. (Parks and Recreation)

Leslie tries to come up with her next great idea while listening to "Steal my Sunshine" (Parks and Recreation)

"Is it TNT? Are Rizzoli and Isles friends in real life?"- Liz wonders what new channel Jack's acquired for Cabletown. (30 Rock)

"I don't know if my tone is conveying my fury about this but I am, pardon my french, bonjour. Now, that's a joke, but I am really really mad" - Hank, the head of Cabletown about Jack's new channel acquisition. "It's okay Jack, you made a bad decision and bought something you didn't understand- like when I bought tickets for Black Swan. Remember when a movie was just a fellow in a hat running away from a fellow with no hair?" (30 Rock).

AN AARON SORKIN WALK AND TALK!- see previous post. (30 Rock).

The Ultimate TV Icon Matchup

30 Rock this week.

Aaron Sorkin and Tina Fey (Liz Lemon) sit at a conference table waiting for interview with Nick Lachey to work on the NBC reality competition show The Sing Off. 

Sorkin: You here for the Sing Off gig?

Fey: Yeah, do I know you?

Sorkin: You know my work. Walk with me.

They stand and begin a classic Schlamme walk and talk

Sorkin: I'm Aaron Sorkin- The West Wing, A Few Good Men, The Social Network...

Fey: Studio 60?

Sorkin: Shut up. Do you know Nick Lachey? I hear he doesn't even let you sit in the meeting, he just screams at you to see how you react.

Fey: But you're not really applying for this job are you?

Sorkin: Of course I am. You've gotta take work where you can find it. Especially now, our craft is dying while people are playing Angry Birds and poking each other on Facebook. What is poking anyway? And why won't anybody do it to me? I'm cool.

Fey: So it's really that bad out there. I mean, you're Aaron Sorkin... speaking of Angry Birds, do you know how to beat 11.4? It's just a red guy and a green guy.

Sorkin: Key is do not use the green guy as a boomerang.

Sorkin sits back down at the conference table. 

Fey: Did we just go in a circle?

Sorkin: Listen lady, (a gender I write extremely well if the story calls for it) this is serious. We make horse buggies and the first model T just rolled into town.

Fey: We're dinosaurs.

Sorkin: We don't need two metaphors, that's bad writing, not that it matters.

An assistant walks in

Assistant: Mr. Sorkin, Mr. Lachey will see you now.

Sorkin gets up and enters the office, buttoning his jacket like Leon when he enters the oval office.

Sorkin: Mr. Lachey- huge fan, huge fan, I have all your albums...

True Love: Other Stuff Edition

It's Valentine's time and TV is in full romantic bloom. Here are our favourite romantic episodes of the week:

1) Glee 
(We've covered this already. Twice)

2) Community
(This too. Just once)

3) Modern Family
The reprisal of Clyve and Juliana, Gloria turning Valentine's day into a competition, Manny's quest for Hayley's love, Cam and Mitchell's jealous search for attention, the triumphant return of Dylan! Brilliant.

4) Raising Hope
It wasn't romance, it was bromance, but it was awesome. "Romeo and Romeo" was the hilarious story of two star-crossed single dads in desperate need of a friend. Hilarity ensued.

5) 30 Rock
Not overtly Valentines-themed but based almost completely on couples when the show almost never is, this week's 30 Rock saw the return (and dismissal) of my (and everyone else's) beloved Matt Damon (seriously, who doesn't love this guy?!).

6) The Office
An awkward (but cheeky) Pam and Jim plot and a sweet but strange one for Michael and Holly made this episode of the office slightly above average. What made it significantly above average (at least for the current season) was Erin's Valentines treasure hunt. It was designed for her by the wonderfully deadpan new character Gabe and followed by my favourite character in the office, Erin, and her endearing ex Andy. It was sweet, it was melancholy, and it disrupted the office wonderfully (the scene with Darryl is classic).

"The Sisyphus of Reagany"

Last night's 30 Rock was close to perfectly conceived.

The clever B story had Jenna and Kenneth pairing up once again (always a great team), this time to con an ice cream shop. The duo's hijinks played out nicely, but they really upped the ante in teaming up with Kelsey Grammar to pull a long con as the newly-formed "Best Friends Gang". The combination of classic NBC in-jokes and celebrity self-deprecation with Hollywood genre spoof was simply brilliant.

The fun C story marginalized the annoying Tracy without robbing him of his punchlines, and it's "back to one" structure worked perfectly. 

It also folded brilliantly into the fantastic A story. Jack's "perfect game" of solving everyone's problems perfectly for a whole day was just all kinds of good (self-satisfied advice-giving, absurd reverence for the wrong political figures, baseball references!). But when Liz's sexual hangups threatened to ruin his perfect game (also known as his "quest for Reagany"), he helped her anyway, throwing out my favourite line of the night: "When you're pitching a perfect game, you don't walk Albert Pujols. And you're the Albert Pujols of having problems".  The whole pitch-perfect story of character-detailed-wonderfullness culminated in an oddly sweet pronouncement of friendship from Jack: "You deserve someone like Carol and he deserves you because, and I'm only gonna say this once a decade, you're great. You're Liz Lemon, damn it! In certain lights you're an 8, using east coast over-35 standards, excluding Miami."

It was an episode after my own heart, and a reminder of why I've always fundamentally loved these characters, especially Liz and Jack, the friendship at the heart of the show.

How Great Is Matt Damon?

Seriously. He takes a recurring guest role on innovative comedy 30 Rock and continually fricken rocks it. On top of that, he's willing to show up for five minutes in the middle of a live episode not ONCE but twice.

He's one of the most famous actors, acclaimed thespians, and overall great guy moviestars of our generation. He's beloved. He's an oscar winner. And he's also the Pilot named Carol who loves Liz Lemon.

He's just a great guy.

God Save the Queen

There are hundreds of reasons to love Queen Latifah. Tons and tons of them. I love everything she does, she's just so cool! The newest reason? This week's 30 Rock. The clever-as-hell episode tackled diversity in the workplace on both sides of the issue and didn't skimp on the always-funny punches at NBC. A political keyword riff, a Donald Glover shoutout, a John Amos cameo and a "thankyou NBC" song combined with my beloved Rob Reiner (complete with an All in the Family reference and When Harry Met Sally name drop) and the power of the Queen= awesome, just awesome.

"I don't know where I'm going with this but I know we'll get there together... troops, flag, troop flags!"

Where I Stand

I realize I have fallen behind on the many many things happening in the TV world right now. It's finale time, which means it's My TV Season Wrap-Up time so my plate is quite full of writing to be done. In the mean time, in case you haven't been following @mytvblog on twitter (which you all should), I thought I'd get you caught up briefly on where I stand on the TV issues of the moment:

The Survivor and Amazing Race Finales: in both cases the wrong person won and the most deserving competitor took second. As much as I would have liked to see Caite win the race and throw it in the face of all the snobby pseudo-intellectuals who teased her, the title should have belonged to the cowboys, who ran the most consistently impressive race. As for Survivor, the finale was fun because Jeff was super snarky with bitter Russell but the only reason Sandra should have won was if she had actually succeeded in taking Russell out when she tried. This was Parvati's season, she played the best game and really should have had it.

The Lost Finale: I'm generally pro, though I understand why the mythology-oriented fans are left disappointed. It was an emotional, character-driven, spirituality-heavy farewell and if that's not your Lostian focus then you couldn't have been happy. As for me, a super sap who's all about character over plot, I loved that it got me emotionally reacting to Lost again. Despite solid writing, excellent effects and superb acting, the MVP award goes to composer Michael Giacchino for creating iteration after iteration of his iconic "important emotional moment" music for the episode's record breaking number of important emotional moments.

NBC Thursday Finales: Community offered its weakest episode yet (read Rachael's Season Wrap-Up for more, all of which I agree with), 30 Rock's finale was awesome after a really rocky season (again, see Rachael's Wrap-Up) and The Office was hardly noteworthy at all (hence, Wrap-Up still pending) except for the promise of Holly's return.

The Grey's Anatomy Finale: Amazing. A couple minor flaws but generally the best episode they've done possibly ever (after an altogether strong season). I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, even though I knew who would perish/survive because of contract news.

The Dancing with the Stars Finale: The right person won and managed to remind me that even if I despise her current band, I loved her first one and she was my favourite when she got her big break on Popstars back when I was a kid who watched Popstars. Also, Derek Hough is a god of choreography and dance and energy. Also, I love Evan Lysacek, he reminds me so much of my friend Chris.

Tomorrow's American Idol Finale: Team Bowersox!

The Bachelorette: I'm still not on board with Ali (she was just WAY too mean to Vienna, who danced on the DwtS finale btw and was beautiful!) but I do love The Bachelorette. I'd watch Chris Harrison do anything and there are already some really promising bachelors (including a cutie from Vancouver who caught my eye early).

Friday Night Lights: It's back and I'm still OBSESSED. I love very few things as much as I love this show.

Astronaut Matt Damon (Season Wrap Up: 30 Rock)

This week on 30 Rock, perennially single gal Liz Lemon met the perfect man. And as we've all known since way before he first figured out "it's not [his] fault" thanks to Robin Williams , the perfect man is Matt Damon.

This is guest casting at its finest, like Brad Pitt playing the charter member of the I-Hate-Rachel-Green-Club or Michael J. Fox playing an obsessive compulsive doctor on Scrubs, where the fact that the character is played by a movie star adds to the already awesome fun of the episode and where their considerable personal charisma adds to the show rather than distracting. And who doesn't occasionally need to see pilot Matt Damon goofy dance to a gospel choir?

Plus the episode was pretty top notch. Everything from the fun little meta-humor at the wedding with the melodramatic music playing during Avery and Jack's final confrontation to the excellent one liners were classic 30 Rock. All in all, an excellent season capper to an uneven, if underrated, season of a still excellent show.

Quotable Quotes:

"Yeah I'm a doorman, to the sky." (Astronaut Matt Damon*)

"Sky law, it's when I turn on the fasten seat belt light and nobody's allowed to talk until I get ten minutes of silence. I made it up, but people are stupid."

"You know what a good pilot would have done, not hit the birds. That's what I do every day, not hit birds. Where's my grammy invitation?"

"I hate people too." (Liz, explaining how perfect the two are for each other)

Season Grade: B-

Season Finale Grade: A

*I'm aware he was a pilot, not an astronaut.

**On a personal note, as a Boston girl replanted in Baltimore, I sort of loved that Jack's two lady loves represented the excellent Bawlmer accent contrasted with the beautiful drunken stumbling of the Bah-ston accent.

Liz Lemon Dreams Big

In one of the more genuine moments of the often broad comedy machine that is 30 Rock, Liz Lemon monologued last week to a poor unsuspecting dodgeball player about what she wants in a relationship. I don't think I've ever loved Liz Lemon more:

“I’ll tell you what I do want. I want someone who will be monogamous, and nice to his mother. And I want someone who likes musicals but knows to just shut his mouth when I’m watching Lost. And I want someone who thinks being really into cars is lame and strip clubs are gross. I want someone who will actually empty the dishwasher instead of just taking forks out as needed, like I do. I want someone with clean hands and feet and beefy forearms like a damn Disney prince. And I want him to genuinely like me, even when I’m old. And that’s what I want”. –Liz Lemon (30 Rock)

you know what's always funny?

Brian Williams jokes! They are always funny, as evidenced by this week's 30 Rock, last season of SNL and many many Daily Show episodes.

Other 30 Rock highlights this week include:
- the Horberger system
- a Susan Boyle shout-out
- Tracy and Jenna working together
- a flashback to Liz's auditioning days
- facetious product placement
and
- everything about Dot Com!

Hey, 30 Rock's Back To Being Hilarious...YAY!

The Best Part? All of It.

- Tracy tries to kill Betty White by calling her and yelling "boo" then tries to bludgeon Jimmy Fallon after asking him if he's famous: "I did a movie with Queen Latifa once".
- Jack forces Liz to head down south instead of to Toronto or San Francisco to find the new cast member, prompting lots of fun about what's "real" America, what "real" Americans want and why that can't come from Canada or "the people's gaypublic of drugaphornia" (aka San Fran).
- Jenna forces herself on the writers and defends her actions to her gay friends: "oh, don't look at me like I'm a football game"
- Lutz, Toofer and Frank's pathetic Halloween party flashback complete with costumes
- Liz fights Jack's assessment of southerners with TV references galore:"stop calling them simple... sure some of these people are simple, but some of them are smart like Matlock; or wholesome like Ellie May Clampette; and some of them are skeezy dirt bags like the Dukes of Hazaard, driving around like maniacs, children use those roads".

Welcome Back Tina & Co. I've Missed You.

Adieu Monsieur Hamm

At the end of a fabulous episode last night, 30 Rock bid farewell to the beautiful Mr. Jon Hamm. To understand why Liz would break up with Mr. Perfect I suggest watching the episode, it's sort of brilliant and not a cop out at all. 

As for the rest, they all had great stories too. Jack trying to renew Tracy's contract, Kenneth divided between loyalties and Jenna trying to recapture her fame with a charity publicity stunt. 

And the icing on the cake? A guest stint from Role Models' Bobb'e J. Thompson as Tracy Jr. 

Thursday Night Comedy Block = Yawnsville

The Office and 30 Rock, after both having strong showings last week, were sort of underwhelming tonight.
The Office's plot was pretty weak, in particular. After Michael's misguided, Willy Wonka-inspired Golden Ticket promotion goes awry (losing the company 50% of their biggest client's money), David Wallace is looking for someone to blame. One of the biggest weaknesses of this episode is the other story: Jim, Pam, and Andy all give Kevin different advice in his quest to win the heart of the lady we saw him flirting it up with last week. In a good episode, this would be a cute C-story. In this episode, it's a very weak B-story.

In particular, though, my biggest Office pet peeve is when Michael is played purely selfish for laughs and specifically when he shows no regard for Dwight. It's a throw back to the British version, where David and Gareth, despite Gareth's suck-up-age, were incredibly mean to each other. But by this point in the show, I don't want to watch Michael sell Dwight down the river the second he senses his job is in trouble. I 100% believe he'd sell someone down the river, but I'd like to have seen him struggle more with what he was doing to Dwight. That being said, the episode capper with Dwight getting caught in the infinite loop of logic that was the ding dong KGB joke was all sorts of fantasticness.

30 Rock, even on an off week, can inspire giggles in me that make me seem like a stoned fourteen year old, but this week's just felt blah. Not only have we yet to get resolution on the Liz Lemon/ Don Draper love story (although we did get meta-teased about it with the constant references to Hamm), but a plot following Lemon in jury duty and Jack trying to come up with the name for a mini microwave and Jenna trying experimental drugs isn't exactly the stuff of legend. And while I love the idea that Liz uses her crazy Princess Leia guise to get out of jury duty, in an episode this otherwise weak, the throw back just felt like laziness. That being said, Kenneth, upon finding out he's in charge of TGS, immediately declaring that "all menstruating women must go home immediately" was exactly the kind of comedy randomness that keeps me coming back week after week. And the increased interest in the supporting players is nice, although I miss Pete and I wish the ones besides Frank and the hot girl got lines. What ever happened to Toofer and Josh? Not even Dot Com and Griz got to play in this episode.

Can We Put Don Draper in Every Show?

Seriously?

(In honor of Valentine's, I thought you all would like a little Jon Hamm. Enjoy, but as a warning, he gets a bit needy when his pyro daughter shows up and his mother/grandmother dies.)

Thursday Night TV by the Numbers

6 Actors Who Shone This Week

Michael Urie (Ugly Betty), Joel Grey (Private Practice), Chandra Wilson (Grey's Anatomy), Ana Ortiz (Ugly Betty), Jane Krakowski (30 Rock), Amy Brenneman (Private Practice). 

5 Interesting Developments

Violet is pregnant (Private Practice), Izzie is sick (Grey's Anatomy), Suzuki is straight (Ugly Betty), Charlotte wants to get married (Private Practice), Kim has a photographic memory (Kath & Kim). 

4 Touching Moments

Marc stands up to Wilhelmina (Ugly Betty), Michael struggles with deceiving good people for his own advancement (The Office), Liz takes a hit to save Jack's dignity (30 Rock), Violet and Cooper have a best friends moment in her office closet (Private Practice). 

3 Ridiculous Plots

Kim tries to become the nightly news anchor woman (Kath & Kim), Lexi breaks Mark's penis (Grey's Anatomy), Kenneth tries to get Tracey to eat his vegetables (30 Rock). 

2 Promising Characters Who Kinda Stink

Betty (Ugly Betty), Addison (Private Practice). 

1 Real Question

Is Hilary Swank hot? (The Office). 

Who's That Voice?

Could you identify the talent behind tonight's 30 Rock original song? 

Scroll down for clues as to the identity of the singer who satirically sang while Alec Baldwin, Selma Hayek and the old man went out on the town. 

1. He was discovered while performing at a wedding

2. He's Canadian

3. He dated British actress Emily Blunt for 3 years

4. He's famous for singing jazz and American standards

Find the answer in the Comments section

Golden Globes Highlights

Tonight's Golden Globes Award Ceremony left much to celebrate. The most notable being:

- KATE WINSLET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! After countless fruitless award nominations, my favourite actress finally gets rewarded for her hard work and immeasurable talent. She wins Best Supporting Actress in a Drama for her flawless portrayal of Hannah Schmitz in The Reader, giving a beautiful and humble acceptance speech.

Also, she's been adorable all night with her best friend and co-star Leonardo DiCaprio and her husband and director Sam Mendes at her side.

Oh, and SHE WINS ANOTHER ONE!!!!!! Best Actress in a Drama also goes to Kate for Revolutionary Road. She can't believe it. I can't believe that she manages to be so freaking awesome, even when freaking out.

- Mickey Rourke. His performance in The Wrestler was a tour de force like I've never seen. He wins Best Actor in a Drama and gives a lovely and not at all embarrassing speech.

- Heath Ledger rightfully wins Best Supporting Actor for playing The Joker. Everyone stands. Chris Nolan accepts on his behalf.

- Tina Fey wins yet again for 30 Rock and gives another flawlessly funny self-effacing speech. Jane Krakowski has a conniption when reading the envelope with Tina's name in it.

And when 30 Rock again wins Best Comedy Series, Creative PoohBah Tina lets Tracey Morgan accept the award instead of her talking again. He says that they had a deal that if Obama was elected Tracey'd get to speak for the show.

- Ricky Gervais congratulates "Winslet" by bringing up her guest spot on his sitcom Extras, in which she, playing herself, says that if you do a Holocaust movie you win awards.

- Emma Thompson jokingly offers to help an adorable Sally Hawkins as she nervously stumbles through her acceptance speech for Best Actress in a Comedy for Happy-Go-Lucky.

- Martin Scorsese presents the lifetime achievement award to his best friend, Steven Spielberg.

- and Kate Winslet. Did I say that already? Oh well, she's awesome, I'll say it again: KATE WINSLET FINALLY WINS AWARDS!!!

30 Rock: the Best Reunion since Romy and Michelle

30 Rock this week could not have been better. This season has been consistently pretty funny but it's episodes like this that remind me why the Emmys always go Tina Fey's way. 

Kenneth, Tracey and Jenna had one of the most amusing B stories ever on the show; actor narcissism is always funny. Jack was his usual fantastic self plus a couple additional doses of awesome, even his assistant Jonathan got some solid gold material. 

But, as usual, the star stole the show. Liz Lemon's high school reunion was a re-imagining both so funny and so true that I am literally still laughing. Of course Liz was a bitch; she's defensive and awkward and clever, it fits perfectly. And what is a comedian if not someone who makes fun of others, often because they're uncomfortable. And the fact that she didn't realize that she was so mean? AMAZING. After all, everyone thinks they're the hero, never the villain. 

And, of course, the best 30 Rock episodes advance the friendship between Liz and Jack, something that this episode did incredibly well. Forget all those "true friends" in movies that stick up for the nerd when they're being made fun of, sticking up for the one who everyone thinks is a terrible person because you know better- that's friendship. 

Brava Ms. Fey, Brava!

PS: look out for the guest spot from the wonderful Janel Moloney (aka Donna Moss on The West Wing)

A Very FRIENDly Night

First of all let me beg your forgiveness for the impossibly bad pun in that title. 

Now, on to business. 

Tonight was a night full of FRIENDS (the 90s NBC sitcom, in case you didn't catch on). Jennifer Aniston's highly anticipated guest appearance on 30 Rock was pretty funny and FRIENDS references were everywhere (the episode was even named "The One With the Cast of Night Court" after FRIENDS' signature episode title format). 

But the real comedy of the night was not provided by the Emmy winning headline stealer, but rather by her former co-star Paul Rudd (who played Phoebe's husband Mike). Tonight I saw his new movie Role Models, which he both co-wrote and starred in, and it was fantastic. 

I loved Rudd on FRIENDS as well as in Clueless and he has been one of the most consistently funny aspects of the many Apatow movies he has appeared in. In Role Models, free from the Apatow umbrella and in a rare leading role, Rudd really shines. 

The movie's premise (2 screwups get court-ordered community service to mentor kids) doesn't hold a lot of promise but the movie itself delivers beyond all expectations. The characters are all, with a few exceptions, really engaging. The writing (both plot and dialogue) is very clever (as well as delightfully film reference-laden). The film is perfectly cast (the impossible happened, I liked the McLovin kid, I loved him in fact), the story is sweet yet somewhat surprising and I laughed the entire way through. 

So though NBC's reliable Thursday night comedy lineup delivered on their average, the silver screen was the winner of this FRIENDS-filled night. 

Fan-freaking-tastic!!!

The woman who is inarguably on top of the world with multiple Emmy wins, the most talked about SNL political impression since Bush Sr., and a massive cult following, has done it again. 

Check out the fabulous season 3 premiere of 30 Rock a week early over on NBC.com or Hulu.com and see why Tina Fey (the writer and the performer) deserves everything she's got. 

The episode is hilarious and heartfelt and pretty close to perfect, with Liz right at its center, a host of wonderful guest stars and an emphasis on the amazing Liz/Jack dynamic. 

For a woman who's Emmy speech contained the words "I'd like to thank my parents for instilling me with a confidence that far exceeds my talent", she couldn't be any more talented. But that very self-deprecating humour is one of the many fantastically endearing features of Tina Fey. 

Tina Fey for world domination. Because, after all, I am 100% certain that she is better than everyone else. 

(that was a Baby Mama joke, by the way)