Ten Things I Definitely Don't Hate

I was joking recently that the only thing I feel qualified to blog about lately is shows on ABC family. But here's the thing... I REALLY like ABC Family shows. Every time I start off liking one semi-ironically, it ends with... well, long indulgent blog posts on why the show is so amazing.

So, slightly more-on-the-nose than I normally like, here's the top ten reasons why I Love Ten Things I Hate About You's TV incarnation despite my natural inclination, and the incorporated ten reasons why the CW could learn a thing or two from its less scandalous cousin.

10. The witty one liners: whether it's Kat and Patrick's banter, the hilariously inane chatter of Bianca and Joey, or the touching emotional moments that keep it going, Ten Things (and my other ABC family obsession, Greek) is consistently a well-written wunderkind.

9. The fact that all the characters, even the bitchy ones, turn out to be awesome: even Chastity, the evil head cheerleader, has turned out to be a fascinating individual for whom you actually end up rooting. Joey, the vacuous boy toy keeping Bianca away from Cameron, is an adorable aspiring model of the Zoolander strain.

8. Don't even get me started on how awesome these incarnations of Bianca, Kat, Cameron and Patrick are.

7. Okay, get me started... they're amazing.

6. The fact that Cameron and Bianca don't end up together, or at least haven't yet: It's far too often assumed that if the pilot starts with X pining away for Z, X and Z therefore belong together, whether or not as the show progresses that coupling makes any sense. In the case of 10 Things, Cameron and Bianca never really did (even if Joseph Gordon Levitt was totally the better man in the movie version). Therefore, the fact that the show has done a fairly convincing job of moving them from clueless-and-in-love to friends is sort of astonishing.

5. The way they deal with alcohol and drugs. It seems like shows that feature teens tend to fall into two camps on this: either they overly dramatize alcohol and drugs into being life-or-death and good-kids-don't-touch-them (think After School Specials or Full House) or they completely underplay the issues associated with their use and/or glamorize their use (think Gossip Girl, the OC). I don't really have an issue with that. But I love that in the ABC Family world, it's not after-school-specialy, but it's also rooted in a truth that admits that it's not cool to let your parents down and lie to them, nor is it a good idea to get hammered all the time before you even have a license to get taken away with the DUI.

4. Gay characters. It's not just that there are gay characters. But, after last week's coming out episode of Ten Things, it's that these shows feature gay characters in a realistic, sympathetic, and most importantly post-whatever kind of way. What do I mean? I mean the fact that Calvin is an awesome dude who happens to date guys (often) on Greek and that Cameron (on Ten Things) was more freaked out by the idea that Alex wasn't a level 8 wizard than he was by his homosexuality. And while the characters are mostly chill, realistic portrayals of gay guys, it's also not like the shows sweep their sexuality under the rug. Instead, they actually feature these guys going through issues that gay guys have to deal with because our world still isn't perfectly post-homophobia. There's literally no other shows dealing as sincerely, movingly, and most importantly funnily with these issues than those on ABC Family.

3. Sex. This is kind of a corollary to the Drugs one, but Greek and Ten Things (although kind of brought down by the sexual horror story that is The Secret Life of The American Teenager)deal with sex in a genuine, fascinating and unique way. Characters both accept the importance of sex (and not just of losing your virginity, but of continued sexual activity) and accept that good kids are doing it (pun definitely intended) too.

2. The episode of Ten Things where Kat and Patrick decide to have sex starts with her saying, "Let's get tested." This is what I'm talking about. Rather than turning the whole thing into a public service announcement about waiting until you are ready (which is obviously once you are married), Ten Things shows a path whereby responsible teenagers can be honest with themselves about what's going on and what they desire, and therefore make good choices. They even talk in depth about protection. When's the last time a CW show had a character reaching for condoms before engaging in ill conceived coitus?

1. The fact that the characters mess up in totally kid believable ways. They're mean to their parents and they're secretive, despite the fact that they love their dad and want to do the right thing for him. they're conflicted between their desire for a social life and their desire to do the right thing. Especially Kat, whose a bad ass post-feminist genius, but still occasionally a judgmental blow hard who makes the wrong decisions and jumps on the back of a motorcycle to impress a guy.

Convinced you yet?

Think you have too much free time on your hands?

In other semi-embarassing TV-watching-related news, my once passing fascination with the TV show version of Ten Things I Hate About You has turned into full blown obsession. As the show moves into its second season, it's gotten even better, wittier, and more engaging. The characters have deepened, their relationships finally gone past the movie, and damn if Patrick Verona isn't seventy degrees of sexy, even without the Australian accent. Kat Stratford continues to be one of the biggest badasses around, whether she's ditching school on a motorcycle or "protesting for better lunch meat or whatever it is you white girls complain about." (oh yeah, nice little meta-joke for all us old timers who remember the movie imbedded in the most recent episode). Even Bianca is getting some much needed fun, thanks to storylines that don't ask her to just parade after popularity and instead bring her character human things to do, like trying to redefine her relationship with Cameron given that she shut him down.

The point of this little post, besides my inherently confessional nature, is that all of Season Two is on Hulu, and they're perfect little half hour trifles that are thuroughly enjoyable, reusable, and entertaining. So go Green, My TV Blog readers, and enjoy an episode of 10 Things.

Confessions of a Post-Teen TV Queen

I have a confession to make.

I am a sucker for teen television shows (not the confession yet). This is pretty obvious. I love Greek, and Gossip Girl, The OC and Dawson's Creek are on constant DVD rotation, and I'm already set up to TIVO pretty much every new CW show.

So... despite my inclinations away from things that may ruin my all time favorite teen movies, I recently started watching Ten Things I Hate About You (the tv show). This is still not the confession.

I like it a lot. (Not the Confession) I loved the movie with a passion that bordered on mania, so this probably shouldn't have shocked me as much as it id, despite my initial "STEP THE HELL AWAY FROM MY PRE-TEEN YEARS" reaction. Sure, it did away with all the silly Shakespeare references, and most of the plot, but it kept the anti-authoritarian ridiculousness and fantasticly high brow dialogue.

No in fact, the confession is... I think I like television Katarina Stratford more than movie Kat. Don't get me wrong. I quoted Katarina Stratford, as played by Julia Stiles, ad naseum. I desperately wanted to be her army-t-shirt-wearing, angry-girl-music-listening, heath-ledger-kising self.

But, Katarina Stratford, as played by Lindsey Shaw, is sort of amazing. Maybe it's just getting to spend more time with her before she becomes domesticated by Petruchio (I mean Patrick), or maybe it's because Shaw doesn't come with years of post-10 Things mediocrity baggage, but Lindsey Shaw's sarcastic smart girl act is amazing, and the smart, witty dialogue that elevates this show every single episode seems to fall easily out of her mouth. Although no man can possibly out bad-ass Heath Ledger's Patrick Verona, Lindsey Shaw has easily overcome my post-20s cynicism and turned me back into the girl who just wanted to be as cool as Katarina. Her angry, defensive, intelligent, amazing Kat is believably badass in a way few actress have the emotional maturity and wherewithal to pull off.

Okay, it feels so much better now that my television soul is unburdened with this.

NOTE: Okay, so it's been a slow TV summer.

2 Big Things Invade Your TV: one's a teen comedy based on a Shakespeare play, the other is not

This past week I found myself needing to clean out the DVR box and as a result I finally got around to watching two new series premieres. Hung and 10 Things I Hate About You surprisingly left me with similar feelings. Mainly, the two shows were pretty horrible premieres in that they both served the purpose of setting up the future story lines without really allowing the audience to truly like any of the characters.

Let's start with the show I'm least ashamed of watching: Hung. This series stars Thomas Jane as Ray Drecker, a recent divorcee who quickly finds himself nearly broke. Ray's two children (who thus far add absolutely nothing to the show) originally were living with him until the house practically burned down and they fled to live with their mother (played seamlessly by Anne Heche). Ray is a teacher which automatically means he has no money, so he signs up for a course about entrepreneurship. While taking the course, Ray learns that he must discover what his money maker is and sell this to the public. If you couldn't already guess from the title, it turns out Ray's money maker is his extremely large penis. Ray realizes this after Tanya, a poet he had a past sexual fling with, suggests he sell his body. The entire episode essentially focuses on Ray's sucky life and his decision to prostitute himself to make some money. Tanya ends up offering to help him and the process and act as his pimp.

Now it's hard to really judge Hung based on this episode alone. Frankly, it was a bit slow paced and boring, but the odd friendship between Ray and Tanya could prove to be entertaining. The two clearly aren't heading for a romantic relationship so it will be interesting to see exactly who the writers bring on as possible counterparts for these two characters. The best thing going for the show right now is it's time slot. Hung airs immediately after True Blood on Sunday nights so it's guaranteed to find a few loyal viewers. So next week when True Blood airs, stayed tuned a little longer and see what you make of this ridiculously conceptualized show.


Before I even begin talking about the next premiere, let me set the record straight. A few weeks ago I initially heard about ABC Family's upcoming re-working of 10 Things I Hate About You. I immediately vomited in my mouth and wrote it off completely. Then, a few days ago, a friend e-mailed me a link to the show's site saying, "horrible ideas I hope you are preparing to blog about." It was at that moment when I decided to brave the storm, watch the show, and then trash the hell out of it. Sadly, I'm not sure I can do that cause the thing is I think I kind of liked it. Okay, okay, put the angry fists down and stop yelling at me through the internet a moment and hear me out will you? As a child of the 90s I'm infuriated by the concept of a show which thinks it can measure up even slightly to the amazingness of 10 Things. On the other hand, as an avid television watcher, the premiere itself wasn't all the bad. Every single one of the actors and characters from the movie version out perform the television version ten-fold, but the writing is kind of damn good. The thing which saves 10 Things is the quips, sarcasm, and generally goofiness inherent in the script. These kids are kind of funny. And they do things like call the bitchy popular girl "Voldemort" and say things like "Can we turn off NPR it's giving me menopause?". Really, these aren't even the best examples. But the show has some potential.

The premise is essentially the same as the movie, two sisters are attending Padua High School and one is the know-it-all, slightly pretentious bitch while the other is blond girly-girl who everybody likes. Patrick is the creepy, bad-ass guy who no one likes and Cameron is the dork in love with the pretty girl. The main difference is in the television version the sisters are the new comers to Padua High, not Cameron. The audience then gets to see Bianca's attempt to become popular which is fairly difficult since the Cordelia-esque Chastity quickly writes her off after discovering her familial relations. In the end, Kat attempts to secure her sister a spot with the popular kids by threatening Chastity with printing ugly pictures of her in the yearbook (typical, over dramatic teen plots).

Really the biggest problem for this show (other than the fact that the movie will clearly always be better) is that Patrick is kind of too creepy. Think Edward Cullen eye rapes Bella creepy...not good. The writers would have been better off making Patrick have no interest in Kat but the first thing he says to her is that she interests him. I'd personally rather see the building of said interest as opposed to it just randomly appearing out of no where.

I'm ashamed I watched this, I'll admit it, but I will also admit that I plan on watching it again. I laughed out loud several times and I was pleasantly surprised by the writing. If you're anything like me, swallow you're pride and give it a shot.